This last week, I met with my senior pastor. This does not happen often, so when I come I come prepared with questions. Since I have been at this church, I am so honored by the men who make up our Directional Leadership Team. Their respect and unity among them is incredible. I have seen them disagree behind closed door and so love the way they treat each other. They are not perfect men but I want to be like them in 15-20 years.
1 Corinthians 11:1 And you should imitate me, just as I imitate Christ.
Those are quite the words. There is such a level of responsibility in them. I asked my pastor how he created this culture of honor among his men. Here is what he said:
- Clothe yourself in humility.
Humility is choosing to be known for who you really are, nothing more and nothing less. He said he often reminds himself of how he needs insight and direction that he doesn’t have on his own. Recognizing our need for wisdom is key for being clothed in humility, especially our need for God’s wisdom.
Proverbs 15:33 Fear of the Lord teaches wisdom; humility precedes honor.
Do you work with people? Then you need wisdom. Are you married? Then you need wisdom. Do you parent a teenager? You really need wisdom. Do you really believe God’s wisdom is best? Do your choices reflect that?
2. Honor Other Peoples Strengths and Weaknesses
You are incredibly gifted! However you do not posses all gifting. Nor can you develop all gifting! I will never be able to sing. I sing like a dying dog. I will never be invited to sing on a worship team. My pastor shared how he intentionally surrounds himself with people who shore up his weaknesses. He said he is not good with detail and feels constrained in structures. So he puts two men around him who are amazing with details and creates healthy structures. He says then comes the hard part, He has to stay out of the detail and structure. He says when he micromanages them, he is not honoring their strengths. So where are you weak? Financially? Marriage? Parenting? Business? Friendship? Something at work? Who is great at it that could help you in your journey?
3. Be Vulnerable
He says vulnerability is your willingness to admit where you are and how you need led. He shared how he chooses to be under authority and that there are people in his life that can tell him “no.” Who can tell you no? Who knows your brokenness? A mentor of mine once told me that I am only as strong as the men in my corner who can and has the courage to tell me “NO” and I would follow. Who is in your corner like that?
So are you clothed in humility? Do you value the strengths and weaknesses of others? Who are you vulnerable with? These are marking of a real “man’s man.”
Go Be Vital
Recklessly, obsessively following Jesus